Letter to young women

This letter is dedicated to young women between the ages of 12-21, although some women over the age of 21 can benefit from reading this as well. Ladies, I’m writing this because I am concerned about some of you who are making bad decisions without realizing that, “the decisions you make today determine how you live tomorrow.” There are way too many “teen moms”, too many young women dropping out high school and settling for GED, too many young girls who are promiscuous, too many young women trying to “keep up with the Joneses” and live the fast life. Every time I read an article in newspaper about the alarming rates of teen pregnancy or watch the saga on M.T.V (Teen Mom or 16 and pregnant) I can’t help, but to think what is happening to our youth? When did it become cool to have a baby? Who told these young girls its okay to have a baby that they cannot afford to take care of? Why are so many young women settling for casual sex? What ever happen to waiting for marriage? Why are so many young black women dying of HIV/AIDS or living with herpes and other STD’s? I don’t know the answers to these questions, but I do know that change is necessary and anything I can do to elicit change or to help someone make better decisions, I am willing to do it. It's only right that I speak up because it is my purpose to serve as an inspiration to others.

I’m 27 years young and I’m not perfect by a long shot. I made few mistakes along the way and learned from them, but I‘m grateful to say that the mistakes I made did not alter my life in a major way. I’m grateful to say that I was able to profit off of other peoples experiences….meaning that I witness my close friends and family members go through good and bad situations and I learned quickly what to do and what not to do. I know you can’t always base your life on what other people experience, but TRUST me you can learn a lot by watching and listening to people.

Life Lesson # 1 BE LOYAL 2 YOURSELF – so many of us young women put so much emphasis on being loyal to guys that we date that we forget to be loyal to ourselves. I’ve heard a lot women say “I’m so loyal to my man, I tell him everything… blah blah blah…etc” okay that’s all good, but are you loyal to yourself? And does your man tell you everything? If the answer is no to either question than may be you need to reevaluate what loyalty means in your relationship. Now I’m not saying that a man has to tell you everything in order to show you that he is loyal nor am I telling you not to be loyal to your partner. All I am saying is BE LOYAL TO YOURSELF FIRST! The same energy you spend investing in your man you should spend 3 times as much energy investing in yourself. The reality is “LIFE HAS NO GUARANTEES” even though you want that relationship to last forever, it does not always turn out that way so make sure you come out on top.

Life Lesson #2 DO YOU – when I say “DO YOU” I don’t mean go out and be promiscuous like many of you are already doing. I mean take care of your business. Go to school; get your degree, become an entrepreneur or career woman; don’t let no man, no woman, no human being stop you from achieving your goals. I don’t care how good he looks, how bad you want to have cute little babies with him….STOP and think about long-term consequences. Ask yourself: How will this decision affect me 10 years from now? Be smart and think things through, five minutes of instant gratification can cost you a lifetime of happiness so don’t make impulsive decisions. Don’t worry about whether he will stick around or not if you chose to focus on you, TRUST me if you are a decent respectable woman he will stay or he will come back. No real man is going pass up a good woman that has something going for herself, if he does he is stupid and not the one for you.

Life Lesson # 3 Protect yourself at all times (LOL this reminds me of the Mayweather verses Ortiz fight, LOL if you have no clue what I am talking about Youtube it LOL) –on serious note, I’m talking about protecting yourself when it comes to sex. The reality is times are changing; parents you cannot prevent your teenagers from having sex, the only thing you can do is educate them about it. I don’t know about everyone else, but my mom never had the birds and bees talk with me, I learned about sex in my sex education class in high school. After watching so many disgusting STD’s videos in class the message was clear to me. I knew all the risk associated with having unprotected sex and I was not willing to take that risk. It’s tempting to want to do it, but when I think about long term consequences it’s not worth it. Ladies before you say “he can get it” make sure you know what he has before you get it.

I hope this letter helped a least one young lady think differently about her life. You are special, you deserve the best, you should never settle for less. Know your worth; value your life and THINK, THINK, THINK before you react.

God Bless, KEEP THE FAITH, love Ms. Kinsey